This week has been dominated by one major thing for me, an that's been booking the Asylum. The Asylum is Europe's, if not the World's, biggest Steampunk convention held every year for the past four years in Lincoln, UK. We wanted to go last year but missed out, mostly because of being unable to afford it and going to see Owl City instead, but this year we've decided to save up and go, at the expense of a holiday.
I should probably back up a bit here, as some of you may have got confused the moment I said 'Steampunk'... It's a hard concept to explain, especially when the word contains the word 'punk', but I shall try my best to explain my view on this rapidly growing subculture. The way I see it, punk means going against society's expectations, which in the 70s meant anarchy and destroying symbols of authority, but today society seems to expect this sort of behaviour whether it's due to chavs vandalising local amenities or country-wide riots, so the central ethos of steampunk is the old British motto of 'keep calm and have a cup of tea', therefore defying society's expectations in a different way. Once the punk part has been explained, only then do I get asked what steam has to do with it, and the simple answer is because we glorify the age of steam. Of course, it's not as clear cut as that either- steam engines don't need to be involved for something to be steampunk. It would be more correct to say it's a glorification of mechanics over electric, for something to be steampunk it needs to have mechanisms rather than buttons.
Many people try to explain steampunk as being a victorian aesthetic with gears and cogs, and if you search for steampunk on etsy then you'll find plenty of examples of 'stick a cog on it and call it steampunk', but that just doesn't work- yes, put cogs and gears on it but they have to create the illusion of functionality at the very least. It should also be said that not all steampunks believe things should be exactly as they were back before the invention of electricity (though that is the style I'm attempting with my 'past' blog), instead it is very much a case of how would things be today if electricity wasn't invented. This leads to the image of Zeppelins in the sky, and all sorts of contraptions based on modern inventions but steam-powered, like variations on automobiles, though there's also an element of the fantastic and things that aren't quite possible, which is why Jules Verne and H.G Wells are considered the grandfathers of steampunk. It must also be said that another central aspect of steampunk is the plausibility of something working- for instance, that we could replace airplanes with Zeppelins- but the limitation of if such things were created they would be wildly impractical and often outright dangerous- for instance, the Hindenburg.
So all of that being said, what is the Asylum? It's a place where several hundred like-minded people can gather together, dress in whatever style they deem appropriate and fits whatever the individual prefers best; which to me is a Dickensian attire and to my girlfriend is like a desert explorer similar to Indiana Jones, but to others could involve golem-esque suits, brass angel wings, colonial military costume, or even pirates. Once there then there are various workshops on how to make things, probably modifying nerf guns and the like (something we are working on ourselves), a grand market usually inside the prison with each cell containing a stall, and book signings by up and coming steampunk authors hopefully including Robert Rankin, culminating in a ball and other musical entertainment in the evening, even with a bit of adult cabaret (which we probably won't get involved in) and a zombie survival game utilising said nerf guns. All of this is contained within the castle at Lincoln, and suffice to say we are very much looking forward to it and being a part of what will hopefully become the modern equivalent of the goth movement of the 80s, though without those pesky emos sullying our good image.
Friday 10 February 2012
Wednesday 8 February 2012
Enter the Kirin
Several years passed, and things were all going according to the foxes plan, with a few minor exceptions that were quickly removed from the equation. A lot of animals were starting to forget how to transform which made them easy to deal with, and those that could still transform were either eliminated by the foxes or agreements were made to pacify them. None showed the level of cunning that the foxes had, and as expected the humans were starting to run low on food stocks because of the greedy raccoons, meaning every day the foxes' advantage grew. Though one day, this would all change.
It was a vibrant Spring day, as cherry blossoms fell from the trees. The humans were preparing to plant their crops with the aid of a few raccoons, but before they could do so there was a commotion as a group of creatures were heading towards the town in a slow procession. Everyone gathered to watch them come in, as they were all hooded though quite clearly humanoid, and the patches of skin that could be seen had very faint darker spots. They seemed quite oblivious of the crowd that gathered, and continued at their relaxed pace to the centre of town and the elder's home, proceeding to create a circle around the entrance as one of their number moved forward- a creature notably larger than his companions. The elder was waiting at the door to greet them and walked up to the man that was apparently their leader. The group bowed at him as he approached, including the leader who stayed bowed as the human approached.
'Greetings on behalf of the humans,' said the elder, 'which creatures do we have the pleasure of meeting today?'
The creature in front of him stayed bowed, not saying a word. The elder could just make out the cloaked figure's eyes under his hood that seemed to be looking straight through him. The circle around him were still looking in his direction with their heads lowered, as the humans and raccoons watched and whispered amongst each other, trading opinions on the strange creatures.
'Alright then... What brings you to our village then?'
The cloaked figure said a word, though barely audible. All the figures remained bowed, which the elder was growing increasingly concerned about- what a moment ago was reverential respect, now seemed like veiled threat.
'Excuse me? You will have to speak up.'
The sound the creature made was surprisingly high pitch for such a masculine figure, and came out as a kind of whine that sounded as though the creature was not entirely comfortable with speaking in this form. Again, it was just a single word though this time it was clear what was being said.
'Laaand.'
'I'm sorry, we have no land to offer,' said the elder becoming nervous, 'we already have arrangements with the-'
He was cut off mid sentence as the creature in front of him screeched out a painful cry that hurt the human's ears.
'Land! You... will give us laand.'
'I think you should leave. We certainly don't want to deal with beasts that won't even show themselves in front of us.'
Another unusual sound came from the bowed man, and several of those surrounding him were starting to shift on their feet uneasily. The leader of the animals was shifting under his cloak as his body was getting bigger and more elongated, clearly shifting into a quadruped shape. Something like horns were starting to protrude from his hood, as the elder backed away until he bumped into his closed door. Some of the other animals were starting to transform as well, and the crowded humans and raccoons were starting to panic, some rooted to the spot entranced and some starting to run.
'Why are you...' started the elder as the creature in front of him revealed his true form, bucking the cloak off his back as he fully revealed his antlers before immediately charging at the elder, impaling him against his own door. Those others that had transformed started charging at the crowd with their antlers, as those that remained human drew blades. The elder started coughing up blood as he looked at the blazing eyes in front of him and attempted to speak.
'You are... Kirin?'
The deer snorted, pushing deeper into the wood, further crushing the elder.
'But Kirin are... peaceful? Why...?'
And with that, the elder gave one last cough before slumping over the deer's antlers, lifeless. The deer pulled himself free and observed the chaos around him before transforming back into human form. He spoke to the body of the elder, still struggling to talk.
'Not all creatures as in legend, hunter.'
He issued another blood-curdling shriek that caught the attention of all around, and the deer calmly returned to their leader's side. Little blood had been spilled as the deer only killed those that fought back, but most humans were intelligent enough to run and hide. The raccoons were long gone, having run back to their own village. The leader of the deer called for the attention of the humans and issued his decree.
'Kirin own village now. You help us. Hunter now servant. If fight, hunter die like alpha.'
The humans tried to make sense of the deer's broken language in their confused and panic stricken states, and many started to kneel. One stepped forward to speak with the leader.
'I am Kenshin, I advised the previous elder.' Kenshin bowed to the deer. 'I am humbled by your presence, Kirin.'
The deer bowed back before speaking.
'You command, hunter?'
'I will try to explain your will.'
And so the deer explained to Kenshin about how humans continued to hunt the deer when they first transformed despite their clear intelligence. The deer soon became tired of constantly running and hiding from humans, so took the offensive to reclaim their land from the hunters- then the land could be returned to the animals, and it would be the turn of the humans to be used as labouring animals. The deer didn't want to become violent, but knew fear worked much better than negotiation, hence only killing the leader and those that got in the way. Kenshin could understand their point of view, but was confused by one point- humans had made an agreement with the foxes and raccoons that they would not hunt anything and instead concentrate solely on farming, but because foxes could communicate better with other animals then they would be able to accurately judge which were suitable for hunting. Kenshin also explained that the humans were not happy with how the foxes were taking advantage of them at every possibility, as humans were too frightened of the Kitsune's power. The deer scoffed at this, saying they had no such powers- the deer were aware of their legend as Kirin which meant they should be able to spout flames from their mouths amongst other things, and that the whole idea was ridiculous. The same would hold true for foxes, who only gained transforming ability at the same time as everything else and certainly didn't have any kind of magic. It soon became evident to both of them that the foxes had played them both for fools, abusing their reputation as Kitsune to control the humans and pretending to be human as they hunted to deceive the deer. And so it was decided that if the humans could keep up the charade of being invaded by deer who abused their own reputation as Kirin, then they would be able to play the foxes at their own game.
It was a vibrant Spring day, as cherry blossoms fell from the trees. The humans were preparing to plant their crops with the aid of a few raccoons, but before they could do so there was a commotion as a group of creatures were heading towards the town in a slow procession. Everyone gathered to watch them come in, as they were all hooded though quite clearly humanoid, and the patches of skin that could be seen had very faint darker spots. They seemed quite oblivious of the crowd that gathered, and continued at their relaxed pace to the centre of town and the elder's home, proceeding to create a circle around the entrance as one of their number moved forward- a creature notably larger than his companions. The elder was waiting at the door to greet them and walked up to the man that was apparently their leader. The group bowed at him as he approached, including the leader who stayed bowed as the human approached.
'Greetings on behalf of the humans,' said the elder, 'which creatures do we have the pleasure of meeting today?'
The creature in front of him stayed bowed, not saying a word. The elder could just make out the cloaked figure's eyes under his hood that seemed to be looking straight through him. The circle around him were still looking in his direction with their heads lowered, as the humans and raccoons watched and whispered amongst each other, trading opinions on the strange creatures.
'Alright then... What brings you to our village then?'
The cloaked figure said a word, though barely audible. All the figures remained bowed, which the elder was growing increasingly concerned about- what a moment ago was reverential respect, now seemed like veiled threat.
'Excuse me? You will have to speak up.'
The sound the creature made was surprisingly high pitch for such a masculine figure, and came out as a kind of whine that sounded as though the creature was not entirely comfortable with speaking in this form. Again, it was just a single word though this time it was clear what was being said.
'Laaand.'
'I'm sorry, we have no land to offer,' said the elder becoming nervous, 'we already have arrangements with the-'
He was cut off mid sentence as the creature in front of him screeched out a painful cry that hurt the human's ears.
'Land! You... will give us laand.'
'I think you should leave. We certainly don't want to deal with beasts that won't even show themselves in front of us.'
Another unusual sound came from the bowed man, and several of those surrounding him were starting to shift on their feet uneasily. The leader of the animals was shifting under his cloak as his body was getting bigger and more elongated, clearly shifting into a quadruped shape. Something like horns were starting to protrude from his hood, as the elder backed away until he bumped into his closed door. Some of the other animals were starting to transform as well, and the crowded humans and raccoons were starting to panic, some rooted to the spot entranced and some starting to run.
'Why are you...' started the elder as the creature in front of him revealed his true form, bucking the cloak off his back as he fully revealed his antlers before immediately charging at the elder, impaling him against his own door. Those others that had transformed started charging at the crowd with their antlers, as those that remained human drew blades. The elder started coughing up blood as he looked at the blazing eyes in front of him and attempted to speak.
'You are... Kirin?'
The deer snorted, pushing deeper into the wood, further crushing the elder.
'But Kirin are... peaceful? Why...?'
And with that, the elder gave one last cough before slumping over the deer's antlers, lifeless. The deer pulled himself free and observed the chaos around him before transforming back into human form. He spoke to the body of the elder, still struggling to talk.
'Not all creatures as in legend, hunter.'
He issued another blood-curdling shriek that caught the attention of all around, and the deer calmly returned to their leader's side. Little blood had been spilled as the deer only killed those that fought back, but most humans were intelligent enough to run and hide. The raccoons were long gone, having run back to their own village. The leader of the deer called for the attention of the humans and issued his decree.
'Kirin own village now. You help us. Hunter now servant. If fight, hunter die like alpha.'
The humans tried to make sense of the deer's broken language in their confused and panic stricken states, and many started to kneel. One stepped forward to speak with the leader.
'I am Kenshin, I advised the previous elder.' Kenshin bowed to the deer. 'I am humbled by your presence, Kirin.'
The deer bowed back before speaking.
'You command, hunter?'
'I will try to explain your will.'
And so the deer explained to Kenshin about how humans continued to hunt the deer when they first transformed despite their clear intelligence. The deer soon became tired of constantly running and hiding from humans, so took the offensive to reclaim their land from the hunters- then the land could be returned to the animals, and it would be the turn of the humans to be used as labouring animals. The deer didn't want to become violent, but knew fear worked much better than negotiation, hence only killing the leader and those that got in the way. Kenshin could understand their point of view, but was confused by one point- humans had made an agreement with the foxes and raccoons that they would not hunt anything and instead concentrate solely on farming, but because foxes could communicate better with other animals then they would be able to accurately judge which were suitable for hunting. Kenshin also explained that the humans were not happy with how the foxes were taking advantage of them at every possibility, as humans were too frightened of the Kitsune's power. The deer scoffed at this, saying they had no such powers- the deer were aware of their legend as Kirin which meant they should be able to spout flames from their mouths amongst other things, and that the whole idea was ridiculous. The same would hold true for foxes, who only gained transforming ability at the same time as everything else and certainly didn't have any kind of magic. It soon became evident to both of them that the foxes had played them both for fools, abusing their reputation as Kitsune to control the humans and pretending to be human as they hunted to deceive the deer. And so it was decided that if the humans could keep up the charade of being invaded by deer who abused their own reputation as Kirin, then they would be able to play the foxes at their own game.
Monday 6 February 2012
Anticipation of Snow
January 31st 1912
Today we headed to the city to find parts for gun modifications, though our journey was marginally delayed as our friend who would accompany us was having issues with his transportation. We had enough time to get what we need done, however, though we couldn't find all the parts we needed. On the way we caught a faint glimpse of snow on the roads though nothing significant. On returning home, I made my signature chicken meal and listened to a phonograph known simply as 'Paul'- a comedy about an extra-terrestrial trying to return home, and the Americans getting in the way.
February 1st 1912
I am quite impressed with my ability to keep up with this journal for a whole month, hopefully I can keep it going the entire year. It has not done much to increase my motivation for regular writing, but I swear I will concentrate more on it soon. The main problem is having peace and being free from distractions to do it. Today's distraction came in the form of being told I should check my weight, and discovered I've apparently put on a few pounds over the last year. In an attempt to improve this right away, I had a half hour jog before tidying in preparation for tomorrow, when my girlfriend's family intend to visit. Much to my annoyance, when I went to have a shower there was no pressure in the pipes as works were being undertaken on the supply.
February 2nd 1912
As promised, my girlfriend's family visited today. Just her mother, sister, and grandmother but it was an enjoyable visit nevertheless. They mostly wanted my girlfriend to sign a document for the bank, but they also brought cake with them which was an unexpected surprise. When they left, I decided to look through some notes on our weekly game, and decided I could probably do a better job so got to work on trying out new rules. It didn't work very well though, so I think I will just stick with the way things are even if they are slightly unbalanced and contradictory.
February 3rd 1912
As we are going through quite a cold snap, we decided to go out for a walk today, partly to see if it had been snowing and partly to take photographs of the icicles we suspected had formed. They had indeed, and we got some impressive photos and also met the owner of the gardens we were trespassing on- thankfully he didn't mind as he was taking photographs of his own, though he did complain a little about how his garden always sits in the shade. On the way back we stopped by the shop for some essential supplies, and encountered a group of children- some of whom were evidentially playing truant, which the local police constable also noticed. One of the children was dragged back to school, as his friend took a photo of him uttering something most unusual- 'ahh lol'. I know 'lol' is an abbreviation used in much written correspondence though it is unusual for someone to speak it out loud as it literally means 'laugh out loud', but combined with the 'ahh' it made the girl sound very Irish. I returned home to do some writing, mostly on the subject of oriental monsters which also gave me some ideas to incorporate into my game tomorrow.
February 4th 1912
Such a boring day today. We couldn't play our usual game as our friend was still ill, and our other friend who often visits had been snowed in. There wasn't any snow to speak of in this town, so we couldn't even go out to take more photos. Instead much of the day was spent entertaining ourselves with other games and whatever there was to be found on the aethernet. During my browsing I did come across an event called 'the Asylum' which takes place in September. It is a celebration of speculative fiction based on the works of Jules Verne, H. G. Wells, and Nicola Tesla to name but a few. I would sorely like to go, but it is extraordinarily far to travel- moreso even than where my parents live. We shall see, though.
February 5th 1912
I've decided that despite the cost and distance, we shall be going to the Asylum this year. We had missed out on the event the last couple of years, and as it's the biggest event of it's kind in Europe, if not the world, then we would be fools to miss out. After discussing with our friend, he has decided to join us meaning we can split the travel costs of getting up there. All that remains is to book our rooms, which I shall do once we receive money from our friend. Also today I decided to call my mother to find out how things are, and discovered that she intends on selling an old stamp and coin collection. I gave her the names of some dealers local to her, so hopefully I shall hear something soon of what the collection is worth and how much I can expect to receive from it. On the aethernet there were all sorts of comments about snow where my friends live around the country, though unfortunately still no sign of anything but rain here.
February 6th 1912
My girlfriend's been complaining incessantly today about an injury she sustained whilst exercising yesterday, as well as a couple of other complaints. I told her to make an appointment with the doctor, but when she attempted to then she was told there were no appointments available so she should call tomorrow. We went to the market despite her injuries to pick up more supplies, and little else has been accomplished. We were becoming slightly suspicious that our ill friend may have been attempting to avoid us, but he reassured us that our concern was unfounded and that we will play on a different day this week instead, after our party this weekend. I don't think we'll be seeing any snow here any time soon.
Today we headed to the city to find parts for gun modifications, though our journey was marginally delayed as our friend who would accompany us was having issues with his transportation. We had enough time to get what we need done, however, though we couldn't find all the parts we needed. On the way we caught a faint glimpse of snow on the roads though nothing significant. On returning home, I made my signature chicken meal and listened to a phonograph known simply as 'Paul'- a comedy about an extra-terrestrial trying to return home, and the Americans getting in the way.
February 1st 1912
I am quite impressed with my ability to keep up with this journal for a whole month, hopefully I can keep it going the entire year. It has not done much to increase my motivation for regular writing, but I swear I will concentrate more on it soon. The main problem is having peace and being free from distractions to do it. Today's distraction came in the form of being told I should check my weight, and discovered I've apparently put on a few pounds over the last year. In an attempt to improve this right away, I had a half hour jog before tidying in preparation for tomorrow, when my girlfriend's family intend to visit. Much to my annoyance, when I went to have a shower there was no pressure in the pipes as works were being undertaken on the supply.
February 2nd 1912
As promised, my girlfriend's family visited today. Just her mother, sister, and grandmother but it was an enjoyable visit nevertheless. They mostly wanted my girlfriend to sign a document for the bank, but they also brought cake with them which was an unexpected surprise. When they left, I decided to look through some notes on our weekly game, and decided I could probably do a better job so got to work on trying out new rules. It didn't work very well though, so I think I will just stick with the way things are even if they are slightly unbalanced and contradictory.
February 3rd 1912
As we are going through quite a cold snap, we decided to go out for a walk today, partly to see if it had been snowing and partly to take photographs of the icicles we suspected had formed. They had indeed, and we got some impressive photos and also met the owner of the gardens we were trespassing on- thankfully he didn't mind as he was taking photographs of his own, though he did complain a little about how his garden always sits in the shade. On the way back we stopped by the shop for some essential supplies, and encountered a group of children- some of whom were evidentially playing truant, which the local police constable also noticed. One of the children was dragged back to school, as his friend took a photo of him uttering something most unusual- 'ahh lol'. I know 'lol' is an abbreviation used in much written correspondence though it is unusual for someone to speak it out loud as it literally means 'laugh out loud', but combined with the 'ahh' it made the girl sound very Irish. I returned home to do some writing, mostly on the subject of oriental monsters which also gave me some ideas to incorporate into my game tomorrow.
February 4th 1912
Such a boring day today. We couldn't play our usual game as our friend was still ill, and our other friend who often visits had been snowed in. There wasn't any snow to speak of in this town, so we couldn't even go out to take more photos. Instead much of the day was spent entertaining ourselves with other games and whatever there was to be found on the aethernet. During my browsing I did come across an event called 'the Asylum' which takes place in September. It is a celebration of speculative fiction based on the works of Jules Verne, H. G. Wells, and Nicola Tesla to name but a few. I would sorely like to go, but it is extraordinarily far to travel- moreso even than where my parents live. We shall see, though.
February 5th 1912
I've decided that despite the cost and distance, we shall be going to the Asylum this year. We had missed out on the event the last couple of years, and as it's the biggest event of it's kind in Europe, if not the world, then we would be fools to miss out. After discussing with our friend, he has decided to join us meaning we can split the travel costs of getting up there. All that remains is to book our rooms, which I shall do once we receive money from our friend. Also today I decided to call my mother to find out how things are, and discovered that she intends on selling an old stamp and coin collection. I gave her the names of some dealers local to her, so hopefully I shall hear something soon of what the collection is worth and how much I can expect to receive from it. On the aethernet there were all sorts of comments about snow where my friends live around the country, though unfortunately still no sign of anything but rain here.
February 6th 1912
My girlfriend's been complaining incessantly today about an injury she sustained whilst exercising yesterday, as well as a couple of other complaints. I told her to make an appointment with the doctor, but when she attempted to then she was told there were no appointments available so she should call tomorrow. We went to the market despite her injuries to pick up more supplies, and little else has been accomplished. We were becoming slightly suspicious that our ill friend may have been attempting to avoid us, but he reassured us that our concern was unfounded and that we will play on a different day this week instead, after our party this weekend. I don't think we'll be seeing any snow here any time soon.
Friday 3 February 2012
The Dark Side of Pokemon
Sticking with my japanese monster theme, today I'll be talking a bit about pokemon. This isn't a review, because there's thousands out there and I can't say anything more than the fact it's possibly the most popular franchise in gaming history. Instead, I'll talk a bit about the dark side of pokemon- things that make you think the franchise isn't just for little kids.
There are many things, such as literal ghosts in random places, the infamous Lavender Town theme that apparently induces hallucinations and feelings of unease when listened to with headphones, and the innumerable glitches like Missingno., but this article concerns the pokemon themselves- mostly cute and cuddly, but several have very dark stories behind them. Here's a few notable pokedex entries, and the implications:
"It uses its whiskers to maintain its balance and will slow down if they are cut off."- who decided it was a good idea to cut off a Raticate's whiskers, and why would they consider this valuable information for trainers?
"It keeps its tail raised to monitor its surroundings. If you yank its tail, it will try to bite you."- evidently the same person who's going around yanking Pikachu's tail. Incidentally, this is an entry from Pokemon Yellow- the game that has Pikachu follow you around right from the start and is meant to be your best friend.
"It is extremely vindictive. It is said to lay a 1,000-year long curse if its tail is pulled as a joke."- More tail pulling, this time on Ninetales.
"The bug host is drained of energy by the mushrooms on its back. They appear to do all the thinking."- one of the more infamous entries, for Parasect- a pokemon that's essentially become a zombie on evolving. Even more sinister when one anime episode revolved around trying to evolve a Paras who was terrified before evolving, and strangely compliant when it eventually did.
"Alakazam's brain continually grows, infinitely multiplying brain cells. This amazing brain gives this Pokémon an astoundingly high IQ of 5,000. It has a thorough memory of everything that has occurred in the world."- Do I need to say how implausible an IQ of 5000 is? Or what the implications of enslaving something that intelligent are?
"Deep in the night, your shadow cast by a streetlight may suddenly overtake you. It is actually a Gengar running past you, pretending to be your shadow."- a bit of a Vashta Nerada horror (Dr Who reference), especially when the other entries say Gengar hides in shadows to steal the victim's life force.
"Always wears the skull of its deceased mother on its head and never shows its face. It cries mournfully in the moonlight."- another infamous entry from Cubone, although horrifying in it's own right it gets even more so when the games introduced breeding mechanics.
"It was created by a scientist after years of horrific gene-splicing and DNA-engineering experiments."- Mewtwo's entry explicitly states it has a horrific origin story.
"Xatu stands rooted and still in one spot all day long. People believe that this Pokémon does so out of fear of the terrible things it has foreseen in the future."- because all life is ultimately futile and meaningless, apparently.
"The flames it breathes when angry contain toxins. If they cause a burn, it will hurt forever."- Don't make Houndooms angry.
"If it rampages, it knocks down mountains and buries rivers. Maps must be redrawn afterward."- There's actually a few pokemon that are cartographers nightmares, but Tyranitar is the most noteworthy.
"It unleashes psychokinetic energy at full power when protecting a Trainer it has bonded closely with."- horrifying in a different way, thanks to fan art of the human-like Gardevoir.
"A discarded bug shell that came to life. Peering into the crack on its back is said to steal one's spirit."- Guess what you're looking at as soon as you send a Shedinja into battle?
...I could go on, but there's just so many. Instead I'll finish with my top 3 most horrifying dex entries:
"A doll that became a Pokémon over its grudge from being junked. It seeks the child that disowned it."- If Banette was in Toy Story 3, it would be a cross between Child's Play and The Grudge. (someone please fund a remake of Toy Story 3 featuring Banette!)
"It is whispered that any child who mistakes Drifloon for a balloon and holds on to it could wind up missing."- the japanese entry is better, as it explicitly states that children are taken to the underworld. Other entries say it's too weak to actually drag children away, but they do get much bigger...
"Each of them carries a mask that used to be its face when it was human. Sometimes they look at it and cry."- No further explanation needed. Yamasks are enslaved deceased humans that remember their previous lives, making them depressed.
There are many things, such as literal ghosts in random places, the infamous Lavender Town theme that apparently induces hallucinations and feelings of unease when listened to with headphones, and the innumerable glitches like Missingno., but this article concerns the pokemon themselves- mostly cute and cuddly, but several have very dark stories behind them. Here's a few notable pokedex entries, and the implications:
"It uses its whiskers to maintain its balance and will slow down if they are cut off."- who decided it was a good idea to cut off a Raticate's whiskers, and why would they consider this valuable information for trainers?
"It keeps its tail raised to monitor its surroundings. If you yank its tail, it will try to bite you."- evidently the same person who's going around yanking Pikachu's tail. Incidentally, this is an entry from Pokemon Yellow- the game that has Pikachu follow you around right from the start and is meant to be your best friend.
"It is extremely vindictive. It is said to lay a 1,000-year long curse if its tail is pulled as a joke."- More tail pulling, this time on Ninetales.
"The bug host is drained of energy by the mushrooms on its back. They appear to do all the thinking."- one of the more infamous entries, for Parasect- a pokemon that's essentially become a zombie on evolving. Even more sinister when one anime episode revolved around trying to evolve a Paras who was terrified before evolving, and strangely compliant when it eventually did.
"Alakazam's brain continually grows, infinitely multiplying brain cells. This amazing brain gives this Pokémon an astoundingly high IQ of 5,000. It has a thorough memory of everything that has occurred in the world."- Do I need to say how implausible an IQ of 5000 is? Or what the implications of enslaving something that intelligent are?
"Deep in the night, your shadow cast by a streetlight may suddenly overtake you. It is actually a Gengar running past you, pretending to be your shadow."- a bit of a Vashta Nerada horror (Dr Who reference), especially when the other entries say Gengar hides in shadows to steal the victim's life force.
"Always wears the skull of its deceased mother on its head and never shows its face. It cries mournfully in the moonlight."- another infamous entry from Cubone, although horrifying in it's own right it gets even more so when the games introduced breeding mechanics.
"It was created by a scientist after years of horrific gene-splicing and DNA-engineering experiments."- Mewtwo's entry explicitly states it has a horrific origin story.
"Xatu stands rooted and still in one spot all day long. People believe that this Pokémon does so out of fear of the terrible things it has foreseen in the future."- because all life is ultimately futile and meaningless, apparently.
"The flames it breathes when angry contain toxins. If they cause a burn, it will hurt forever."- Don't make Houndooms angry.
"If it rampages, it knocks down mountains and buries rivers. Maps must be redrawn afterward."- There's actually a few pokemon that are cartographers nightmares, but Tyranitar is the most noteworthy.
"It unleashes psychokinetic energy at full power when protecting a Trainer it has bonded closely with."- horrifying in a different way, thanks to fan art of the human-like Gardevoir.
"A discarded bug shell that came to life. Peering into the crack on its back is said to steal one's spirit."- Guess what you're looking at as soon as you send a Shedinja into battle?
...I could go on, but there's just so many. Instead I'll finish with my top 3 most horrifying dex entries:
"A doll that became a Pokémon over its grudge from being junked. It seeks the child that disowned it."- If Banette was in Toy Story 3, it would be a cross between Child's Play and The Grudge. (someone please fund a remake of Toy Story 3 featuring Banette!)
"It is whispered that any child who mistakes Drifloon for a balloon and holds on to it could wind up missing."- the japanese entry is better, as it explicitly states that children are taken to the underworld. Other entries say it's too weak to actually drag children away, but they do get much bigger...
"Each of them carries a mask that used to be its face when it was human. Sometimes they look at it and cry."- No further explanation needed. Yamasks are enslaved deceased humans that remember their previous lives, making them depressed.
Wednesday 1 February 2012
The Tanuki and the Kitsune- part two, Year of the Kitsune
Hikaru and Taichi left the library building, as the village elder was still trying to deal with the other less intelligent animals that were causing chaos. He looked up as the fox and raccoon approached, relieved that he could delegate the task of shooing the animals away to someone else.
'My apologies for the wait, sir,' said the kitsune, 'it has been some time since foxes and raccoons have spoken. We have made negotiations amongst ourselves, we just need to see if you will agree with where humans fit in. Firstly, we kitsune will not be content to live as animals any more. We intend to set up our own towns and will live alongside humans. We will defend ourselves if we need to, but I'm sure it won't come to that, will it my friend?'
The human wasn't sure he liked the idea of this, but the look in the fox's eyes implied that if he disagreed then the fox wouldn't hesitate to take this already established and thriving community through force of tooth and claw. The elder managed to force a weak smile.
'Of course. We won't stop you, great kitsune. I too hope that we will live peacefully for many years. What of the tanuki? Will they form their own towns?' The elder hoped not. It was hard enough feeding themselves, let alone sharing with foxes and it would be almost impossible if raccoons were involved too.
'They have a different plan, tell them Taichi.'
'Um... yes, well, er,' Taichi tried to control his instinct to flee, as he was surrounded by essentially two dangerous predators. He gulped, and attempted to remember the fox's words in the library. 'We are happy to remain in our burrows, and will act as interpreters for the animals that are less used to humans.' He glanced at Hikaru, who grinned. 'Er, on the condition that we are given enough food to live, and that intelligent creatures are not hunted.'
The human nodded, and thought for a moment before giving his reply.
'It will be difficult, as we rely on many of these animals for food. However, we have much farmland, and as we have had foxes killing our livestock in the past, it is clear that they are efficient hunters. We will give food to the tanuki, and allow the kitsune to develop, but only if the tanuki help us around our village- I expect our food supplies will run low under these new circumstances, so we will need something in exchange- and we will give some of our land to the kitsune if the kitsune are willing to give us a share of the meat they hunt.'
'These conditions seem reasonable to me,' said Hikaru, 'on the counter condition that you help us with supplies to build our village as well. The one-time donation of land is not sufficient to justify us giving our hard-gotten food away indefinitely.'
The elder got the impression that the fox mentally added 'not when it can be taken by force' to the end of his sentence.
'Very well, then we have an agreement? Our land and timber to the kitsune in exchange for meat, and the tanuki's labour in exchange for crops? And I would also like to add that we only give what we can afford, we always keep enough to ensure the survival of humans, even at the expense of foxes and raccoons.'
'Very well.' said Hikaru. Both the fox and human's eyes turned to the raccoon, whose eyes had slightly glazed over in the discussion. He realised he was expected to say something, and quickly nodded.
'Yes, yes of course!'
'Excellent, so glad things have worked out so amicably!' said Hikaru with a certain glee, 'Without further ado, I shall return to my cohorts and inform them of the plan.'
And so he gathered his companions and set off out of town, back to the fox's den.
'I, er, I should be going too...' said Taichi, rushing off in raccoon form before the human could reply, leaving his clothes to fall to the floor and the sake bottle smashing on the ground.
On returning to the burrow, Taichi's family were not happy to hear that they would have to start working for their food. However, it meant they had a steady supply of food, and would not have to worry about the foxes any more. They would have to train themselves to deal with humans without running away, but if they could do that then they were almost guaranteed a carefree life, the one thing all raccoons desire.
Meanwhile, the foxes were laying their own plans. They were ecstatic that the humans were allowing them to build so close, and that the raccoons were being as predictable and gullible as always. Sure, the foxes would have to keep to themselves for a while but when the raccoon's greed overcomes the humans' supply then they'll both be begging the foxes for food, and they'll both be in the palm of their paws. Ideally, the raccoons will get so accustomed to having as much food as they like that they'll try getting more than their fair share, leading to conflict with the humans. Then the humans would go to war with them, and the foxes can strike against the victors when their numbers are diminished, then foxes can take their rightful place as dominant species. It even seemed that their concern for the other animals was unfounded, as they were all too stupid to know what to do. From henceforth, this day would be known amongst foxes as the Year of the Kitsune.
That is, until a previously unknown and entirely unexpected variable would enter the equation to put a stop to the fox's plan, and cause havoc amongst all those involved.
'My apologies for the wait, sir,' said the kitsune, 'it has been some time since foxes and raccoons have spoken. We have made negotiations amongst ourselves, we just need to see if you will agree with where humans fit in. Firstly, we kitsune will not be content to live as animals any more. We intend to set up our own towns and will live alongside humans. We will defend ourselves if we need to, but I'm sure it won't come to that, will it my friend?'
The human wasn't sure he liked the idea of this, but the look in the fox's eyes implied that if he disagreed then the fox wouldn't hesitate to take this already established and thriving community through force of tooth and claw. The elder managed to force a weak smile.
'Of course. We won't stop you, great kitsune. I too hope that we will live peacefully for many years. What of the tanuki? Will they form their own towns?' The elder hoped not. It was hard enough feeding themselves, let alone sharing with foxes and it would be almost impossible if raccoons were involved too.
'They have a different plan, tell them Taichi.'
'Um... yes, well, er,' Taichi tried to control his instinct to flee, as he was surrounded by essentially two dangerous predators. He gulped, and attempted to remember the fox's words in the library. 'We are happy to remain in our burrows, and will act as interpreters for the animals that are less used to humans.' He glanced at Hikaru, who grinned. 'Er, on the condition that we are given enough food to live, and that intelligent creatures are not hunted.'
The human nodded, and thought for a moment before giving his reply.
'It will be difficult, as we rely on many of these animals for food. However, we have much farmland, and as we have had foxes killing our livestock in the past, it is clear that they are efficient hunters. We will give food to the tanuki, and allow the kitsune to develop, but only if the tanuki help us around our village- I expect our food supplies will run low under these new circumstances, so we will need something in exchange- and we will give some of our land to the kitsune if the kitsune are willing to give us a share of the meat they hunt.'
'These conditions seem reasonable to me,' said Hikaru, 'on the counter condition that you help us with supplies to build our village as well. The one-time donation of land is not sufficient to justify us giving our hard-gotten food away indefinitely.'
The elder got the impression that the fox mentally added 'not when it can be taken by force' to the end of his sentence.
'Very well, then we have an agreement? Our land and timber to the kitsune in exchange for meat, and the tanuki's labour in exchange for crops? And I would also like to add that we only give what we can afford, we always keep enough to ensure the survival of humans, even at the expense of foxes and raccoons.'
'Very well.' said Hikaru. Both the fox and human's eyes turned to the raccoon, whose eyes had slightly glazed over in the discussion. He realised he was expected to say something, and quickly nodded.
'Yes, yes of course!'
'Excellent, so glad things have worked out so amicably!' said Hikaru with a certain glee, 'Without further ado, I shall return to my cohorts and inform them of the plan.'
And so he gathered his companions and set off out of town, back to the fox's den.
'I, er, I should be going too...' said Taichi, rushing off in raccoon form before the human could reply, leaving his clothes to fall to the floor and the sake bottle smashing on the ground.
On returning to the burrow, Taichi's family were not happy to hear that they would have to start working for their food. However, it meant they had a steady supply of food, and would not have to worry about the foxes any more. They would have to train themselves to deal with humans without running away, but if they could do that then they were almost guaranteed a carefree life, the one thing all raccoons desire.
Meanwhile, the foxes were laying their own plans. They were ecstatic that the humans were allowing them to build so close, and that the raccoons were being as predictable and gullible as always. Sure, the foxes would have to keep to themselves for a while but when the raccoon's greed overcomes the humans' supply then they'll both be begging the foxes for food, and they'll both be in the palm of their paws. Ideally, the raccoons will get so accustomed to having as much food as they like that they'll try getting more than their fair share, leading to conflict with the humans. Then the humans would go to war with them, and the foxes can strike against the victors when their numbers are diminished, then foxes can take their rightful place as dominant species. It even seemed that their concern for the other animals was unfounded, as they were all too stupid to know what to do. From henceforth, this day would be known amongst foxes as the Year of the Kitsune.
That is, until a previously unknown and entirely unexpected variable would enter the equation to put a stop to the fox's plan, and cause havoc amongst all those involved.
Monday 30 January 2012
A Week Dominated by Guns and Japan
January 24th 1912
We had a friend visit, mostly to help my girlfriend with modifying her non-expanding recreational foam gun to make it easier to load, and prepare it for painting to make it look more authentic, as these guns are typically sold in bright colours for children to play with. I should hopefully be receiving my own gun tomorrow, a larger model for long-range shooting. The intention is to go on a hunt at Halloween, hunting those dressed as animals. Whilst they were busy with their guns, I played a phonograph of stories about japanese folk tales such as Ponyo, a fish that becomes human, and Pom Poko, about raccoons that can transform into humans. Quite relevant to the story I am working on, so it served as research of a sort as well as being entertaining in its own right.
January 25th 1912
I received my gun today, and all looks as I hoped. My only criticism is that it came in several parts, and once assembled the parts can't be detached again, which makes it quite cumbersome when I originally wanted it a bit shorter. The shop we received it from was in a new town, that we decided to explore whilst we were there. There wasn't much to see, it looked little more than a road that had shops built around it, which is disappointing. Most of the shops were for food and charities. I don't think we'll be going back very often. I also managed to catch up on a bit of my writing from last week, though annoyingly I am still slightly behind.
January 26th 1912
All this writing is burning me out a little today. Instead we took advantage of the break in the rain to go out with my girlfriend so she could take some photos. We headed to somewhere new, in this case the local cemetery. I find it unfortunate that some of the more modern graves are quite monotonous in appearance, compared to the older graves. I wouldn't be surprised if these cemeteries run out of space soon, and churches will probably have to start buying more land. We paid our respects to those buried there as my girlfriend took her photos, and read some of the more interesting graves- there wasn't much, other than a masonic grave.
January 27th 1912
Inspired by the phonographs from the other day, I decided to take a break from my usual european influenced setting, and instead try writing an oriental story. Of course, this required much research- specifically about raccoons and foxes. I'm quite pleased with what I got done, and think there's a lot of potential for stories based on far eastern myths, so might stay writing in this region for a while more- I'm told that it's always best to have a couple of writing projects active simultaneously. Writing took up much of the day, so I have little more to say.
January 28th 1912
We were supposed to play our weekly game tonight, but unfortunately one of our friends has fallen ill- hopefully not caught from me. Our other friend still came regardless, so once more he decided to help with the guns. I'm slightly disappointed, as I had some plans for tonight's game, but some things can't be helped. My gun still sits unmodified, but I'm sure I'll have time to work on it soon- I'll just wait a bit longer so I can receive help after the smaller guns are done. Instead I played a little music as we chatted. Or it would be truer to say that the phonograph played the music, and I merely played the guitar accompaniment. Luckily I'm good enough that the music comes out tolerable, though there's still room for improvement. I think I'd be better off sticking to my writing, and leave music to the professionals.
January 29th 1912
Today has mostly consisted of more research into japanese mythology, though we had to make an unavoidable visit to the shop as we had completely run out of some basic supplies. I also managed to fit in a little of my Oblivion game, though to be honest it's starting to bore me. I'd stopped playing when I first received it as I found it boring, but decided to give it another chance- I got a fair amount further, but I still can't get into it, which is a pity because at the moment all my friends are talking about the sequel to it.
January 30th 1912
Another tedious day of doing not very much, though broken by some job searching in the local classifieds. All in vain, of course, as almost all jobs advertised are for care assistants- something a little out of my field of expertise. As I started to sink into my jobless pit of despair, however, I found out that there are a couple more parties coming up this year- both fancy dress, one future themed, the guideline being around 1980, and the other is fairy tale themed. And of course we still need to finish preparations for this roman party coming up soon, so we're being kept busy.
We had a friend visit, mostly to help my girlfriend with modifying her non-expanding recreational foam gun to make it easier to load, and prepare it for painting to make it look more authentic, as these guns are typically sold in bright colours for children to play with. I should hopefully be receiving my own gun tomorrow, a larger model for long-range shooting. The intention is to go on a hunt at Halloween, hunting those dressed as animals. Whilst they were busy with their guns, I played a phonograph of stories about japanese folk tales such as Ponyo, a fish that becomes human, and Pom Poko, about raccoons that can transform into humans. Quite relevant to the story I am working on, so it served as research of a sort as well as being entertaining in its own right.
January 25th 1912
I received my gun today, and all looks as I hoped. My only criticism is that it came in several parts, and once assembled the parts can't be detached again, which makes it quite cumbersome when I originally wanted it a bit shorter. The shop we received it from was in a new town, that we decided to explore whilst we were there. There wasn't much to see, it looked little more than a road that had shops built around it, which is disappointing. Most of the shops were for food and charities. I don't think we'll be going back very often. I also managed to catch up on a bit of my writing from last week, though annoyingly I am still slightly behind.
January 26th 1912
All this writing is burning me out a little today. Instead we took advantage of the break in the rain to go out with my girlfriend so she could take some photos. We headed to somewhere new, in this case the local cemetery. I find it unfortunate that some of the more modern graves are quite monotonous in appearance, compared to the older graves. I wouldn't be surprised if these cemeteries run out of space soon, and churches will probably have to start buying more land. We paid our respects to those buried there as my girlfriend took her photos, and read some of the more interesting graves- there wasn't much, other than a masonic grave.
January 27th 1912
Inspired by the phonographs from the other day, I decided to take a break from my usual european influenced setting, and instead try writing an oriental story. Of course, this required much research- specifically about raccoons and foxes. I'm quite pleased with what I got done, and think there's a lot of potential for stories based on far eastern myths, so might stay writing in this region for a while more- I'm told that it's always best to have a couple of writing projects active simultaneously. Writing took up much of the day, so I have little more to say.
January 28th 1912
We were supposed to play our weekly game tonight, but unfortunately one of our friends has fallen ill- hopefully not caught from me. Our other friend still came regardless, so once more he decided to help with the guns. I'm slightly disappointed, as I had some plans for tonight's game, but some things can't be helped. My gun still sits unmodified, but I'm sure I'll have time to work on it soon- I'll just wait a bit longer so I can receive help after the smaller guns are done. Instead I played a little music as we chatted. Or it would be truer to say that the phonograph played the music, and I merely played the guitar accompaniment. Luckily I'm good enough that the music comes out tolerable, though there's still room for improvement. I think I'd be better off sticking to my writing, and leave music to the professionals.
January 29th 1912
Today has mostly consisted of more research into japanese mythology, though we had to make an unavoidable visit to the shop as we had completely run out of some basic supplies. I also managed to fit in a little of my Oblivion game, though to be honest it's starting to bore me. I'd stopped playing when I first received it as I found it boring, but decided to give it another chance- I got a fair amount further, but I still can't get into it, which is a pity because at the moment all my friends are talking about the sequel to it.
January 30th 1912
Another tedious day of doing not very much, though broken by some job searching in the local classifieds. All in vain, of course, as almost all jobs advertised are for care assistants- something a little out of my field of expertise. As I started to sink into my jobless pit of despair, however, I found out that there are a couple more parties coming up this year- both fancy dress, one future themed, the guideline being around 1980, and the other is fairy tale themed. And of course we still need to finish preparations for this roman party coming up soon, so we're being kept busy.
Sunday 29 January 2012
On the Origin of Mythical Species: Japan edition
Before I start, I'd just like to ask any and all readers to leave a comment to say what you think of this blog so far. Good or bad, just say what you think of the concept and style and my general writing ability, what works and what doesn't. Or you can just say 'I'm enjoying it' or 'I'm not really into it', that's cool too.
So my stories have left Europe and are now entering the Orient, partly because of Chinese New Year (happy year of the water dragon!), partly because of watching Pom Poko, and partly because I just felt like it. As such, this blog is about some of the strange creatures found in Japanese mythology and how they fit in my world (if at all).
Tanuki: A simple raccoon dog. The notable feature about them is that they have shapeshifting powers, whether into humans or statues or general objects. They're mischievous but lazy, and the thing most westerners find alarming is that they have prominent testicles- so much so that there are many classical images of them bludgeoning people to death with them, and famously in Pom Poko one of the tanuki turns his testicles into a ship. As seen in my last post, the raccoons are oblivious to this folk tale, but thing may change now it's technically true.
Kitsune: A magical fox with up to nine tails. Kitsune are mostly psychic creatures, with powerful magic, and transforming is a secondary ability- they're apparently not quite as good at it as tanuki, as when they're in human form they still have their tails visible, as well as long faces. They also grow more tails as they get older, up to a maximum of nine. In my stories, they are fully aware of the humans' belief regarding them which they're more than willing to use to their advantage.
Tsukomogami: Objects that have come to life after existing for over 100 years. These spirits vary wildly in appearance, but they're a major source of 'wtf??' for foreigners- most notably are the umbrella/parasol with one large eye and tongue sticking out, and the animated lamp, both of which pop up frequently in anime and japanese computer games. They're generally benevolent, but if they feel neglected then they'll be much more dangerous. As they have no humanoid form, they don't exist in my world- though that doesn't mean people don't believe in them.
Rokurokubi: Humans (almost exclusively women) who have extraordinarily long necks. Allegedly humans who have broken some precepts of Buddhism, they are punished by having long necks at night- sometimes they're not even aware of the fact, as their necks stretch when asleep and they have odd dreams. More often than not, however, they are spiteful beings that delight in frightening or even eating humans, usually drunks or people that are unlikely to be believed. Theoretically possible in my world, but I have to do more research before I can say for certain if they'll be featuring.
Kappa: Unusual creatures that have many analogues in other folklores around the world- basically a creature used to scare children away from bodies of water. Kappa are frog-like humans whose most notable feature is the recess on their head filled with water. If this water runs dry, they will die so they cannot stray far from their pools. Interestingly, adult women are also in danger of kappas raping them, and they can be calmed by bowing to them which will force them to bow back, spilling the water in their head. They are another creature that may feature in my stories, but I don't intend on them having a major role.
There's plenty more, but this all for today as I can't think of any other notable ones. Next week I may attempt to convince you of the dark side of Pokemon...
So my stories have left Europe and are now entering the Orient, partly because of Chinese New Year (happy year of the water dragon!), partly because of watching Pom Poko, and partly because I just felt like it. As such, this blog is about some of the strange creatures found in Japanese mythology and how they fit in my world (if at all).
Tanuki: A simple raccoon dog. The notable feature about them is that they have shapeshifting powers, whether into humans or statues or general objects. They're mischievous but lazy, and the thing most westerners find alarming is that they have prominent testicles- so much so that there are many classical images of them bludgeoning people to death with them, and famously in Pom Poko one of the tanuki turns his testicles into a ship. As seen in my last post, the raccoons are oblivious to this folk tale, but thing may change now it's technically true.
Kitsune: A magical fox with up to nine tails. Kitsune are mostly psychic creatures, with powerful magic, and transforming is a secondary ability- they're apparently not quite as good at it as tanuki, as when they're in human form they still have their tails visible, as well as long faces. They also grow more tails as they get older, up to a maximum of nine. In my stories, they are fully aware of the humans' belief regarding them which they're more than willing to use to their advantage.
Tsukomogami: Objects that have come to life after existing for over 100 years. These spirits vary wildly in appearance, but they're a major source of 'wtf??' for foreigners- most notably are the umbrella/parasol with one large eye and tongue sticking out, and the animated lamp, both of which pop up frequently in anime and japanese computer games. They're generally benevolent, but if they feel neglected then they'll be much more dangerous. As they have no humanoid form, they don't exist in my world- though that doesn't mean people don't believe in them.
Rokurokubi: Humans (almost exclusively women) who have extraordinarily long necks. Allegedly humans who have broken some precepts of Buddhism, they are punished by having long necks at night- sometimes they're not even aware of the fact, as their necks stretch when asleep and they have odd dreams. More often than not, however, they are spiteful beings that delight in frightening or even eating humans, usually drunks or people that are unlikely to be believed. Theoretically possible in my world, but I have to do more research before I can say for certain if they'll be featuring.
Kappa: Unusual creatures that have many analogues in other folklores around the world- basically a creature used to scare children away from bodies of water. Kappa are frog-like humans whose most notable feature is the recess on their head filled with water. If this water runs dry, they will die so they cannot stray far from their pools. Interestingly, adult women are also in danger of kappas raping them, and they can be calmed by bowing to them which will force them to bow back, spilling the water in their head. They are another creature that may feature in my stories, but I don't intend on them having a major role.
There's plenty more, but this all for today as I can't think of any other notable ones. Next week I may attempt to convince you of the dark side of Pokemon...
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